build your blog conference 2015 wrap up

my outfit (day): sweater :: downeast basics // blouse :: silence & noise // skirt :: j.crew c/o uptown cheapskate // tights :: f21 // booties :: mossimo

kumquat's outfit: sweater, kitty t-shirt, purple tutu :: gymboree // tights :: cherokee // silver shoe :: gift

my outfit (evening): jumpsuit :: jbs c/o uptown cheapskate // cuff bracelet :: vintage // clutch :: too faced cosmetics bag // booties :: shi

The Build Your Blog Conference 2015 was held this past weekend at the Little America Hotel in downtown Salt Lake City, and even though I missed part of the conference, I definitely felt the energy and passion from everyone in attendance. An atmosphere like that has a way of re-energizing and re-charging your batteries, and with so much creative energy flowing and great ideas being bounced around, it's pretty much impossible not to come away with a thousand new ideas and a renewed commitment to building your brand.

The key to making the most of all the advice and new ideas, though, is to take just a few things at a time and incorporate them into your blogging routine. Trying to completely overhaul your current system all at once can lead to serious blogger burnout and lead you away from your overall brand vision. It's important to stay true to yourself and the ethos of the brand you're trying to build, while continually learning and incorporating new ideas to keep things interesting.

With that in mind, I wanted to share a few of my favorite tips from my favorite class at the conference, "30 Tips To Get Great Growth" by Matt Cherry of iBlog Magazine:

1. Create and share more videos. Videos on landing pages convert 80% more readers.
2. Create and share podcasts - it's easier for a reader to download an audio file and pop in some earbuds than to read through an entire thousand word post. Record it!
3. Create a list of social media groups to share and participate in every day.
4. Find, follow and interact with the leading bloggers in my niche. Build a rapport with them and support each other.
5. LinkedIn! Beef up my profile, join and participate in some groups and connect with EVERYONE - even my icons and the people I'm too nervous to send a request to!

These are the top five things I'll be focusing on over the next month or so, and I'm especially excited to see what you will think of my first videos and podcasts. Are there any topics in particular you'd like me to discuss? Do you prefer videos, podcasts or the written word? Leave your thoughts and any requests in the comments!

All in all, Build Your Blog 2015 was amazing, and I will definitely be going back next year - after hustling my butt off in 2015 with the goal of deserving a Blogger of the Year award. I still have a lot more to share from the conference (including Blogger BFF deals & freebies, how to dress for a gala on a budget and tons more!). If you were at the conference, I'd love to hear about your favorite classes and the awesome new ideas you'll be implementing on your blog this spring! Leave your thoughts and your blog links in the comments!

P.S. I still owe you a winner from the Uptown Cheapskate giveaway last month! And the winner is....

Mayra Sissi Biggs

Congrats, Mayra! Happy shopping!

6

the second one might be profound

daisy sun dress :: vintage (find a similar one here) | nude wedges :: forever 21 | leather bowling bag :: twin falls leather (similar here) | camera girl necklace :: c/o luce & alati | bangles :: vintage | turquoise ring :: pacsun (similar here) | beverage :: orange creme shake from arby's (cuz it's good mood food)

I typically try to do more with this dress - a belted waist, cute blazer, fun tights, whatever - but the heat was so oppressive yesterday that just convincing myself to wear a padded bra usurped all of my courage to accessorize, and all I was left with were a few mismatched items of jewelry. Besides, on a sweltering day such as this, could there a be a better accessory than an Orange Creme Shake?

This bowling-esque bag is my new and true love. It has about a dozen and a half pockets for me to stuff and organize and carry my life in, and it's beautiful. I've been searching for a bowling bag style purse at a decent price, and stumbled upon this one on my recent sojourn to Idaho with my mother. We stopped at a gas station after a brief stint in the tubs at Lava Hot Springs, where she found her soulmate in the form of a lovely black shopper of the same brand (if you knew my mother, you would understand just how cataclysmic that statement is). I purchased both, as well as third in the form of a charcoal messenger bag for my little sister. The best part? They were only $30 each.

The remainder of today's post is the second in a possibly infinite series of sporadic posts that involve self exploration and exploitation. See the first here.

Because the truth is, as bloggers - as creative, talented bloggers - we exploit ourselves. We use our lives, our love, our pain, our truth, our debt, our joy and our sorrow, and turn it into this beautiful fantasy of [non]fiction for the enjoyment of our readers.

There are a lot of terrible and mediocre bloggers out there, and sprinkled amongst them are some good ones. Even some great ones. Some are (hugely) popular; most aren't. And then there are those who rise above the rest, for whom blogging becomes as much an art medium as painting or writing or acting or math (because, yes, math can be art). But in order to achieve this level of artistry, you have to give yourself over entirely to the process. To the method. You have to know who you are and not be ashamed of it. You have to flaunt your flaws as your strengths, push yourself beyond your self-perceived limits, and never be afraid to air your dirty laundry in public, to hell with what grandma says.

In that vein, some self revelating is in order.

33 things I probably haven't told you

1. I am a writer. Despite all other titles, jobs and roles I may have in this life, I have and will always consider myself a writer, first and foremost.
2. I find it difficult to relate to people, probably because I feel like I'm trapped inside my own head most of the time.
3. I have a bit of an ego. Despite my often self deprecating nature and my aversion to making other people feel bad, I know that I'm smarter than most other people, and I have a tendency to flaunt that when I'm pissed.
4. I have accepted that I am not an expert at everything. The most important part of always being right is knowing when to admit that you're wrong.
5. My biggest fear is that I will spend my life stuck behind a desk or in a file room.
6. I have an intense hatred for the word great. Great isn't good enough for me; I need epic.
7. I am a jack of all trades and master of many, but there is nothing I love more than history, fashion and writing.
8. I am very close with my family, despite the fact that they drive me nucking futs.
9. There are a lot of things I want to be when I grow up. Fashion designer, stylist to the stars, published author, magazine writer/editor, and university professor are a few that top the list.
10. I'm tired of saying, "when I grow up." I am grown up, and I'm ready to start being.
11. I have some pretty damn awesome friends, most of whom I don't get to see nearly enough.
12. I hate blue skies and sunshine, and I get oddly depressed throughout the summer. Give me rain, snow, fog and cold and I'll give you a smile and a laugh.
13. I eat. A lot. Coworkers are still trying to reconcile my love of food with my 5'7"/128lbs frame.
14. I have not had a drop of alcohol nor an illicit substance in over eight months. So where's my cookie?
15. I actually kind of like my day job, but that's only because of my awesome co-workers.
16. I was always the "teacher's pet" in school. In fact, I got away with a helluva lot in high school because they were under the impression I was a good kid. And I was... except for my distaste for actually going to class or doing the assignments.
17. I moved five times in the course of 18 months. That sucked.
18. I make Michael Moore look conservative. And I make no apology for that - but I also understand that few issues are as blatantly black and white as the political pundits make them out to be, and that compromise is the best (and only) way we will ever solve our nation's problems and make this silly experiment in democracy work.
19. I often wonder what it's like to be a "morning person". I usually regret it when I get to the AM part of the day though.
20. I have a very odd memory. I frequently forget important things and shit I'm supposed to do, but I will remember random trivia and seemingly unimportant events for years. Weird.
21. I keep a hand written journal. I believe that hand written communication, even with oneself, is one of the most honest forms there is.
22. Having money causes me intense anxiety - which is why I usually spend it so fast.
23. It's almost impossible for me to hold a grudge. Even if I think I want to hate someone, my anger usually fades pretty fast, and then I just feel dumb-which I also get over pretty quickly. I have, however, learned my lesson about trusting someone who has hurt me repeatedly.
24. I embrace my occasional stupidity, because I have accepted that I am smarter than most other people, most of the time. (refer to numbers 3 & 4)
25. "I'll Follow You" by Shinedown is on constant repeat inside my head right now.
26. There has only been one relationship in my life that I actually thought would last... but it didn't. I have also come to terms with the fact that, although I am not perfect, I am not the one who messed it up. (a note to my other exes: I'm sorry. It wasn't because I didn't want it, or you; it was because I couldn't - see number 2.)
27. My two year old nephew is my favorite person in the world.
28. And my 19 year old sister/business partner is also my best friend. Side note - I really love saying "my business partner."
29. I've made a lot of mistakes in my 26 years of life, but my only true regret is that I haven't traveled very much. This is a situation which I intend to rectify over the next few years.
30. I've never bought a car. Another situation which will soon be remedied.
31. I really like living in Utah. I'm not LDS (or even close to it), but I have to admit - the Mormons run a pretty tight (and clean, and lovely) ship.
32. But there are at least a dozen other places I want to live in my lifetime, including LA, San Fran, the Pacific Northwest, Alaska, NYC, India, London, Paris - to name just a few.
33. I want to be a fighter pilot when I grow up. Read the X-Wing series by Michael Stackpole and Aaron Allston and I guarantee you will want to be a pilot by the end of the first book too.

Psst... Check out the inspiration for this post, from Corbett Barr's blog, here.
Edited-5 June: Minor tweaks only - fixed some grammar, added a couple of details, included a label and inserted a link or two.

4

double the bliss

I'm going to try something a bit different with my post today.

I feel like I have a tendency to "bury the lead" (this is journalist talk for rambling on about unimportant nonsense, while pushing the important stuff to the middle or end), and I know I can be pretty long winded (especially when telling a story about my clothes). Yesterday's post, for example, had some pretty important info in it - at the very tail end. Not everyone likes to read about the random stuff that goes on in other people's lives as much as I do, so I'm betting most of my beloved readers didn't make it that far down.

So, today, we're putting Important Stuff & Awesome Announcements at the top, with Today's Story & Puzzle Pieces making up the second half of the post. Outfit photos will remain scattered about the post for now; personally, I love having photos littered through the text, to separate sections and to break up long blocks of text. I would really appreciate some feedback on my post layout though - leave me a comment or drop me an email and let me know what you think.

important stuff

1]on monetizing your blog & affiliate networks
In yesterday's post, I announced that Frayed Threads has been accepted into one of the more prestigious affiliate networks for fashion bloggers, RewardStyle, and that I have some referrals I'd love to hand out to my fashion/beauty/lifestyle blogger friends. In the interim, it's occurred to me that I never really talked about just what the hell an affiliate network is.

When I first got really serious about turning my blog into my business, I started doing a lot of research on ways to monetize (meaning to make money from my content). Affiliate networks and marketing kept coming up in my research, but every article I read on the concepts baffled me. I didn't really get it, so how was I supposed to make any money from it? I skipped over it, ignored it, and tried to come up with some other tactics.

Eventually, though, I decided to give it a go because it seems to be the easiest route and many bloggers have been fairly successful with it. Once I had signed up for my first affiliate network, I immediately understood how it worked and I was hooked. It's so ridiculously easy that I felt dumb for ever being confused by it.

Basically, it boils down to this: an affiliate network is made up of a group of retailers, all thrown together into one site. As a blogger, you can use an affiliate network's site to find links to items you love, items you wear or items you want to wear. You put those links on your blog, (as part of an outfit post, a wish list, inspiration list, must have list, etc), and when people click on them and buy them, you make a percentage of the sale in commission. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

I talked about some of the benefits of RewardStyle in my last post, so I won't rehash here, but I will reiterate that it's thus far been my favorite network to work with, and I don't think I'll be going anywhere else any time soon. It's also the network of choice for top bloggers like LateAfternoon, This Time Tomorrow and Atlantic-Pacific, and membership is by invitation only for top level, professional bloggers.

Ten of you have the opportunity for an invite. So what are you waiting for? 

Comment on this post (or my last one) with:

-Your name

-Email address

-Blog link

-Your elevator pitch (what your blog is about and why you're so fabulous)

And I'll see what I can do about getting you an invite to the web's premier affiliate network for fashion, beauty and lifestyle bloggers.

Psst... I'm still not sure exactly what affiliate marketing is, but for more info on affiliate networking and monetizing your blog, check out IFB's Fashion Traffic School.

2]up and coming bloggers, please apply here
I am looking for fashion, beauty and lifestyle bloggers to interview as part of a new weekly feature here on Frayed Threads. This idea has been bubbling around in my head for a minute now, and finally came to fruition with the introduction of the RewardStyle opportunity (above). The blogosphere is becoming intensely over saturated with blogs of every type, but it seems to be increasingly difficult to find quality personal style blogs (especially the smaller ones). Sure, there are any number of communities for the growing blog, but how do we pick through every submission to find the diamonds in the rough? Sometimes the plethora of "ADD ME AND I'LL ADD YOU" messages one receives upon logging in are enough to deter the search - so why not let me do the work for you?

The goal of this series is to seek out those bloggers who might just be getting their start, but are clearly a cut above the rest. This opportunity is available for bloggers of all ages, shapes, sizes, races, genders, etc etc etc - I don't care what you look like (in fact, that's part of the fun!), and I'm happy to feature new comers, middle-agers and veteran bloggers alike.

So what does matter then? Only bloggers who are blogging on the professional level - meaning a clean layout, original content, decent spelling & grammar and quality artwork & photos - will be featured. This does not mean that you must have a hundred thousand followers. This series is about profiling the up and comers within their niche and introducing them to the public at large (and vice versa).

Think you have what it takes to be Frayed Threads' next Top Blogger?

Email me with your name, contact info, blog link and a bit about you & your blog and why you're so damn awesome, and I'll get back to you ASAP.
fashion.nerdom@gmail.com

awesome announcements

• IFB is hosting a Blogger of the Month contest on their Facebook page! I <3 IFB with all my heart, and I've really been trying to find some awesome new blogs recently, so this is a great opportunity. If you would be a dear and hop on over to IFB's FB page and tally a vote for Frayed Threads, I might just love you forever - and I'd be more than happy to return the favor. Just leave me a comment to let me know that you've voted me, and be sure to include your name and the title of the photo you submitted so I can find you! (Psst... if you click here to vote for Frayed Threads, scroll down and it should be the top entry, with a photo titled "hold it together").
• I mentioned a few days ago that my utterly unscientific experiment on style would begin May 1. This month is all about changing it up and finding some gorgeous new combinations in my closet, discovering new ways to style old things, and finally deciphering how to wear my problem pieces. I'm really excited to begin this journey, and I encourage you to join me. You can track my month through outfit posts, Instagram (frayedthreads) and/or Twitter (@fashion_nerd13). Leave me your blog link and Instagram/Twitter handle(s) so I can keep up with you as well!

today's story

Today's look ended in a much different place than where it started, and (much to my surprise) the journey ended in a much lovelier place than where I imagined it might.

I purchased this dress from Threadsence over a year ago (while I was still living with Brent), and although I loved it online, I didn't so much love the way it looked on me when I received it. Not one to usually return things, I kept it, and in the year since it's entrance into my life, I've worn it only once - until today.

I stayed up far too late last night (as usual), and so to avoid the inevitable wardrobe anxiety in the morning, I decided to put my outfit together before I went to bed, which left me rummaging through my closet at two in the morning. I found a sleeveless cobalt blue tank and immediately decided it would be ideal with my bright pink skinny jeans and color blocked black/blue/pink heels. It must have looked fabulous in the dim light from my closet lamp, because I was pretty excited to pull it on this morning.

Naturally, I woke up late, so I was relieved that I had put my clothes together before bed. I hopped out of the shower and quickly got dressed... and then realized just how much I hated what I saw in the mirror. Anxiety started to creep up on me as I thought about how little time I had before work, and my mind was racing with wardrobe anxiety.

As I changed in and out of various combinations, I remembered my double layer Threadsence dress that I stumbled across last night - I had even pulled it to the front, thinking that, in light of my May experiment, it would be an excellent addition to my rotation.

I raced upstairs to my closet and pulled the hangar from my overstuffed closet. I yanked it over my head and wrapped the double wrap studded skinny belt around my waist - but immediately changed my mind and replaced it with my favorite wide brown belt. Shoes, of course, also caused me intense issues - I ended up taking three pairs to work with me, on top of the ones I wore out the door - but eventually I settled on these basic taupe sandals I got last week for my birthday. Jewelry and other accessories consisted of whatever I happened to have in my purse (fortunately, those items happened to be my current favorites), and make up was whatever I could apply on the go. The floral scarf was a last-minute addition for a splash of color against an all-neutral background.

My hair also turned out to be quite the happy disaster. I like to wash, blow out and straighten my hair every day - as you can imagine, this is quite a timely process. This morning's situation was pretty dire (even before the wardrobe crisis), so I took a chance and skipped the wash. I threw my hair into a bun while in the shower, and when I got out I ran my dryer over the parts that had gotten damp - my roots. The damp effectively killed any life my hair had, and at this point I seriously considered saying to hell with it and going back to bed. Instead, I whipped out my Bumble & Bumble dry cleanser (in brown). I picked up a tiny bottle for $19 several months ago at Sephora, and despite the hefty price tag (or perhaps because of it), I've been hesitant to try it. This morning was do or die though, so I flipped my hair over and spritzed just below the roots and ran my fingers through it to distribute the powder.

My hair still looked nothing like the models' in the magazine spreads and commercials showcasing the new wave of dry shampoos, but this Bumble & Bumble concoction did give it texture without feeling dirty or grimy - which is exactly what I needed to work it into a gorgeous, messy chignon. I've been relying on this hairstyle a lot recently, and up until this point I haven't been too impressed with my own efforts. I've tried other dry shampoos, but none have actually worked until now. Bumble & Bumble's hair powder is my new secret weapon in achieving the perfect messy hair-do.

puzzle pieces

double layer dress: tini lili, from threadsence

gold cuff bracelet: charlotte russe (similar here)

wide brown belt: vanity

gold sunbeam necklace: nasty gal (find it here)

sandals: forever 21 (similar here)

sunglasses: charlotte russe

messenger bag: ebay (similar here)

floral scarf: walmart (similar here)

2

my closet is in need of a donation

My most recent obsession was started by an advertisement I found in the January issue of Glamour (I even featured the ad on my inspiration board), and it's causing me serious issues.

Joe's 55 Color Jeans are gorgeous, and I'd do just about anything for a pair of their skinny fit in coated rose, jet black and/or coated teal. They are even on my spring wish list, but they're $169 each... I've definitely never paid that much for an item of clothing, but I am seriously considering it for these jeans. Unless, of course, I have a generous benefactor out there who might be willing to buy them for me...? Cuz that would just be swell...

Joe's Jeans: The Skinny in Coated Teal, $169 via JoesJeans.com

Joe's Jeans: The Skinny in Coated Rose, $169 via JoesJeans.com

The teal ones I'd pair with my black button down, black blazer, a skinny belt and some chunky heels; the rose pair would be matched up with my white button down, black moto jacket and flat boots or black pumps; and the jet black ones would go perfectly with a white tuxedo blazer (or maybe that pink one from NastyGal I mentioned previously...), an oversize black slub tank and black pumps. The more I think about it, the more miserable I am that I don't have a pair of these beauties in my dresser already.

Joes Jeans Skinny Fit in Jet Black, $169 via JoesJeans.com

Miami Vice Blazer in Pink, $88 via NastyGal.com

T by Alexander Wang Classic Muscle T-shirt, $80 via NetAPorter.com 

YSL Tribute Tattoo Leather Pumps, $795 via NetAPorter.com

I'd also like to take a brief moment to discuss something that's become an epidemic in the fashion blogosphere: follow me commenting. This refers to someone who visits as many blogs, profiles, etc, and leaves a comment similar to: "Love your blog! Follow me! theirlink.com". Sometimes they'll throw in a reference to a photo in the post to personalize it, but it's usually pretty obvious that they didn't read the post, and that they're just using your blog/profile/post/photo/whatever to try to gain exposure for their own blog. I will admit that I got caught up this mentality - for about thirty seconds. After that, I realized just how low this tactic really is. I find it to be disingenuous, dishonest, rude, self-centered, and aggravating. When I comment on someone else's work, I always try to take the time to make it meaningful and thoughtful. It doesn't take hours to compose a comment like this, but it does take a little more effort than copy-pasting the same comment into a hundred posts. The payoff, however, is always bigger and better for that one thoughtful comment than the hundred follow me's that were left sprinkled around the internet. Building a successful fashion blog is about cultivating real relationships with other bloggers, with your readers, with communities, and yes, with companies and retailers. If you want/expect your blog to turn into a career, you're going to have to put some work into it! /rant

Back to my post...

I wanted to get up and accomplish something today; I feel like I spend all weekend, every weekend, on the internet, blogging and browsing, but I'm just not feeling fantastic today. My throat hurts, I'm exhausted, and I'm cranky. I don't think I'm sick, just massively sleep deprived (as usual), and I need to get some rest before the return of the work week, early mornings and late nights. I was stuck at least an hour late at work every night last week, and I expect that trend to continue well into this next one. Unless someone wants to come help me with my filing...?

P.S. I'm a size 28, regular length...


P.P.S. Hooray for my 50th post!!!

9